Look Ugly in a Photograph

A teacher recently told me that to be a filmmaker, I would have to get better at photography.

Crud.

I think my sister lucked out in the genetic lottery as she is the more talented one when it comes to a camera. She has an uncanny ability to take any digital camera, lift it over her head and take amazing pictures. I always want her to come to concerts with me because the pictures she takes are unbelievable. It's a struggle for me to set up a shot and usually my few good photos are the result of waiting for the exact moment I want to capture.

It's a lot of work but I enjoy it more because it's such a struggle to get something I like. My favourite pictures are the kind with a lot of potential energy in them.




I also love taking "stalker" photos





This last one is my favourite picture of all the ones I've taken. When I visited Bangladesh, every time I'd whip out of camera, people would line up and pose. I wanted to remember the trip as it was so I would sneak my camera out and set it on tables and just snap it really quick.

I like using photos as a journal and taking random pictures of whatever catches my eye. I took about 1500 pictures while in Australia and probably twice that when I was in Bangladesh. I've been doing a picture a day for a year thing over on Facebook for about two months and I take about 10 or so a day for that.

Practice makes perfect right? Eventually I'll be able to take a picture and not immediately want to delete it.

Underrated Women and the Girl Who Emulates Most of Them

Since I made a post about my favourite underrated guys, I thought it was only fair to whip out a post on my favourite underrated ladies.

Firstly, The Birds of Prey
Barbara 'Oracle' Gordon, Black Canary, Huntress, and Lady Blackhawk

Now I love comics but I do find myself growing annoyed with the way the few awesome women in my DC universe are treated. Not many female characters have their own story lines and, when they're included in the main titles, it's often in the capacity of a wife or girlfriend (even if these ladies have powers of their own). This is why I'm digging Birds of Prey. The ladies take on their own cases, solve their own crimes, and fight their own battles. I wasn't around for the first Birds of Prey series but I'm getting quite a kick out of the new series and catching up on their history.

It's always nice to have women in fiction kicking metric tons of ass and having personalities. Seriously? Women? With personalities? In my comics? AWESOME. I have a love/hate relationship with the art but the story-line keeps me coming back. And it's awesome female superheroes. What else do you need?

On a personal note: I'm seriously considering going as Black Canary for Halloween even though I imagine everyone will say, "Great Lady Gaga costume!".

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Wrestling is my new obsession.

The WWE's Divas division's tag line is "Smart, Sexy and Powerful". There's only a few Divas that embody all three characteristics with two of my favourites being in that few. The first is Beth Phoenix and the other is Natayla (Natalie Neidhart).



Every time this girl is given a jobber entrance (no music and she's in the ring as the match starts) or a 2 minute match, I want to punch the TV. She is as brilliant a wrestler as Daniel Bryan but neither are being used to their full potential on WWE programming. Another fist through the TV moment is whenever she's called "fat" by either another female wrestler or that douche-canoe Michael Cole.

I quite admire Nat's obvious love for what she does. Whereas the majority of the other Divas wear the title as just another piece of jewelry, she wears it with the same reverence that the boys hold the World Championship. She takes it seriously while her peers spend their time on the catwalk. Keep your Maryses, WWE universe! I'd rather have Nattie on my tag team.

And I'm totally dyeing a pink strand into my hair because of her.

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So I went to Australia for 3 things: 1) it's gorgeous, 2) Australia Zoo is there, and 3) it's the homeland of Ms. Kylie Minogue



But Kylie, like Doctor Who, is not appreciated in North America. And that is just sad.


When this bad boy starts a-jumpin', I defy anyone not to shake their butt to it

Back in my early 20s, I wanted to write a musical (ABBA-style) using Kylie's entire Fever album. I still want to. It would be bad-ass. And it would bring Kylie her much-deserved American break (and a concert date in Winnipeg for me).

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There are certain life defining moments. My first one was when I saw Batman for the first time. The second was when I saw Mulan at 12.



Seriously, whenever I have children, this is the only Disney movie they're going to be allowed to watch. Little Dinah Lance and Little Bruce Wayne will thank me when they grow up with Mulan as the only Princess in their Disney canon. I was one of those little girls that wanted to be Prince Phillip instead of Princess Aurora. I wanted to slay dragons and always hated that, because I was a girl, I could never do it (never mind that whole bit about dragons not being real).

I wish I had been a bit younger when Mulan came out as I probably wouldn't have been so hard on myself for not being born a boy if I had her as a role model. Oh well, at least I've found awesome women to emulate in my older incarnation.

Now if only the Disney Store would release a Mulan costume for girls that wasn't the dress she wore to the Matchmaker's, Disney would have my respect.

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So, now that you've reached the end of this post, I highly advise you check out a Natalya match, watch Mulan, listen to a Kylie Minogue song, and READ A BIRDS OF PREY COMIC.

Let the following song convince you cause after all....

While all the boys can always save the day, no one does it better than The Birds of Prey!

Underrated Men and the Girl Who Loves Them

I've always been a sucker for guys with character. I think I've mentioned before how big of a weirdo I was when I was a kid. While my friends were pawing through Tiger Beat to drool over Brad Pitt, I was swooning over Gabriel Byrne, Indiana Jones, and Batman.

I also had hearts instead of eyes when it came to Brad Dourif.

I can hear you now, "Who's Brad Dourif?"

That's Brad Dourif

Brad Dourif is one of my absolute favourite actors. Ever since he traumatized all the kids in my school when he played Chucky in Child's Play, I've thought he was the bee's knees. He makes some of the worst movies you'll ever see but I really admire him for how much he loves acting and how he is often the best bits of the worst films because of it (Looking at you, Death Machine). Brad has been typecast as the go-to-person when you need an unhinged psycho. I reckon he is continually cast as a villain because he has the most insane blue eyes I've ever seen. Even as he enters his 60s, his baby blues haven't lost the intensity they had when he was 20 (they even gave Chucky the doll Brad's crazy eyes).

I'm constantly hoping that my local Comic Con will book him just so I can go to his autograph signing and gush, "Brad, you are awesome. I've seen so many of the movies you probably wish you could gather up and burn." And then I get him to sign my copy of Dead Certain.

But you should really see his good movies. He was great in Mississippi Burning, The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers, and One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest (which was his second film role and got him nominated for an Oscar). Even the original Child's Play is great if you can get past the bit of your brain yelling, "It's just a doll! BURN IT" while you watch it. Here's hoping that Brad gets a few more movies under his belt that AREN'T directed by Rob Zombie before he retires.

You know who else rules yet doesn't get as much love as he should? Vincent D'Onofrio.

Even his name is fun to say.

Like my absolute favourite actor in the universe (Tim Roth), Vincent became widely known after he took a role on a TV show. He plays the incredibly awesome, rubber necked Detective Goren on Law and Order: Criminal Intent. But I've loved him ever since he played not-Thor in Adventures in Babysitting (I'm still bitter they didn't get him to make an appearance in the new Thor movie even though they got the TV Thor to cameo). I also think his role as Edgar the Bug in Men in Black was one of the greatest things he ever did.

Vincent is in it for the acting rather than the fame and, as a result, he has made a bunch of bad movies as well. Most of which I've seen. But, like Brad, VDO is often the best bit of the worst movies he's in (And I must admit he was dead sexy in Naked Tango where he played a dapper pimp and and in The 13th Floor where he played a bad-ass Agent Smith rip-off that infects his real-world computer nerd self).

My favourite VDO works are Happy Accidents (which has a bit of a roll-your-eyes premise but he's pretty good in it), The Cell (very pretty and scary cinematography wise), Men in Black ("Dude was that ugly before he was an alien?"), and the Criminal Intent episode "Frame".

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I love Bono. Seriously I do. But I think the rest of U2 tend to get a bad rep because of him.

The Members of U2 that aren’t Bono. AKA the Awesome Ones

It’s unfair that the non-fan tends to see U2 as Bono and The Back-Up. What makes them distinct has very little to do with Bono and a lot to do with the back-up.

Back in their early days before Bono learned to sing, the intensity and urgency of the music came from Larry, Adam, and The Edge with the song Stories for Boys being one of the highlights of their early career. The song is like a battle between the three for the listener’s attention with Larry hitting his kit as hard and as fast as he can while Edge’s light and airy guitar duals it out with Adam’s hard and gritty bass. There are u2 songs that are my favourite due to personal reasons and there are U2 songs that are my favourite because of how much love I have for how they are played. Stories for Boys is one. With or Without You is another. I really hate when I catch it just as it’s starting on the radio because, no matter what, I have to stop and listen to the whole thing. Whereas Stories for Boys is a battle between the three, With or Without You is the three working in harmony. Just how they build it up to the summit then bring it back down just blows my mind every time. I want to get the Joshua Tree on vinyl just so I can nerd out over that song.

I also love it when they get to be highlighted individually. Adam’s bass intro for New Year’s Day with the bass turned high on the stereo has annoyed my mom for many moons. My favourite work of Larry’s is Mofo (which was all him, no drum machines for our boy). And for Edge, I have to go with Mysterious Ways. I have no idea how he makes the sounds he does for that song but I know I love it.

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And lastly, I can't make a list of underrated guys without mentioning my favourite underrated guy.

Christian of WWE fame

Seriously, give this man a title. Give him two. Give him all the titles and close wrestling forever.

She Moves in Mysterious Ways

One of my major goals for 2011 is to become reasonably fit. For years I’d pester my Dad about his poor eating and exercise habits while I would go to my own doctor with a hanging head. My doctor once described my cholesterol level as that of a “fifty year old fat guy”. She also said that many of my more annoying health concerns (the fatty deposit on my back that my sister likes to say looks like a hump) would be eliminated if I just stopped being so lazy. As I said in a past post, I’m possibly the laziest person in Canada. I’ve also never seen the fun in being an intense gym person. Lastly, I was ok with being slightly overweight. I'm not Twiggy but I'm certainly not a blob.

But if you looked up Aboriginal Health Problems in Canada on Wikipedia, there would be a picture of my family. My Grandpa hadn’t been overweight but diabetes had blinded him and rotted his hands and feet away in front of our eyes. My sister was diagnosed with diabetes in our teens though she's been doing fine as of late. My mom’s need for dialysis treatment every other day has to be taken into account whenever we plan trips. My dad is a big guy but he isn’t about to appear on a TLC Fat Guy documentary any time soon. But he hasn’t been without health problems: he had a massive heart attack at a young age that required a triple bypass surgery that we weren’t sure he was going to get through.

I’ve been lucky so far as only a few things have messed with my health but I knew how close I was to suffering major health problems if I kept lazily going down the path I was on. I also realized that, with my extra weight, I couldn’t outrun anyone during the mad rush for the front at a U2 concert. That sealed it, I was going to change.


Everyone I planned to outrun at Sydney 1

The problem was how. I knew I needed to get my butt moving more so I started taking the stairs everywhere. The office I frequent the most other than my own is up 7 flights so I starting taking them. For a month, I'd drop off my invoices at the top while extremely out of breath and sweating. I also started pissing off the people at the Square when I’d choose to take the really narrow and tall staircase instead of the escalator right next to it in order to get to the Skywalk. Again, I’d try to catch my breath at the top.

I also joined the gym that opened up a few blocks from my office. I was tempted over to it from my old gym due to all the classes the new one offered including yoga and dance. I had been suckered in to the 6 sessions “deal” with a personal trainer who introduced me to strength training. And wouldn’t you know it? I began to love it. Not right away mind. I wanted to kill the personal trainer after he made me squat 80 pounds instead of the 50 I was used to. Then I wanted to kill him again when he convinced me that lifting weights over my head was a good idea.

But after a month of going twice a week and alternating the routine that the personal trainer gave me with a weightlifting class at the gym, things started to change. I wasn’t ready to pass out once I reached the top of the stairs at work anymore and I was finally able to do more than 4 push-ups. After two months, people were telling me I was losing weight and I was noticing muscles in my arms that hadn’t been there before. I was so amazed that I’d start randomly doing the Beth Phoenix pose and being amazed when I didn’t jiggle. I didn’t get much gym time in during December as I was in Oz but I still did a lot of physical things like walking back up the hill at Taronga to see the animals I had missed and taking numerous walks through the very-stair-heavy Rocks near Circular Quay.

Another thing I’ve been trying to change is my relationship with food. I grew up with a lot of women that had suffered from anorexia and was always afraid of how easy it would be to fall into the mindset. Even now, as I work out, I’ll sometimes wonder, “Man, how easy would it be to just not eat?” For a while, as a kid, I would hide food so I wouldn’t have to eat it (and nearly had to live in the corner when I stuffed a hot dog down a vent and didn’t tell anyone about it until it was found days later). As a teenager, I went through a phase where I was appalled by the suffering of animals for food so I stopped eating meat. That ended after I became so anaemic that I was the palest Native person in Northern Manitoba (which worked for me as I was a Goth at the time). Recently, I’ve started to make little changes to my diet. I’m including more veggies and fruit, eating more whole wheat, and I started to look at serving sizes when I cooked or when I eat something crappy.

Since I started in September, I’ve gone from 40 to just under 38 inches in the tummy area, I’ve toned up my upper body and actually have a muscle when I flex my arm, and I can leg press 110 pounds (60% of my body weight). I’ve also gone from 197 to 187 pounds. Things are good and I’m actually looking forward to going to the gym most of the time. I’ve started running (on a treadmill) and really enjoy finding sporty things to do outside the gym (going skating and what not). Hopefully this is the beginning of a major change for me. I’ve never wanted to be a size zero but I always wanted to be a healthy old woman still able to take care of herself. If you don’t use it, you lose it right?

Lastly, I’ve also lost most of that fatty deposit on my back and don’t have a hump anymore, which my sister grudgingly noticed. She also has started calling me Randy Orton as my thighs have started to look...well...Randy Orton-y.



I was going for Serena Williams but Randy Orton is ok. He’s got some stems.