Wednesday, February 13, 2013

The Heart is a Bloom

Valentines' Day is upon us and while I wait until February 15th to make off like a bandit with cheap candy, I plan to listen to the radio/songza/my iPod. I have a soft spot for love songs as I think it's hard to write a good one.

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The Sweet
I reckon no one can write a love song like Hawksley Workman. So much so that it was hard for me to pick just one. I was going to pick "Merry Christmas (I Love You)" or "Chemical" but I think "Safe and Sound" is one of his best songs. The imagery is just so beautiful. Every time I've seen him in concert, he sings it like he's in love for the very first time. Gorgeous!



No looking back, no turning into salt.
The city was crumbling but, baby, we're not to fault.
When things got too rough, I promised you we'd leave.
You're safe and sound with me.
----

As a child, my dad and my grandfather were heavily into Johnny Cash. I imagine "I Walk The Line" is the first song I heard as a baby as it is associated with so many good memories for me. My dad used to sing it to me when I was a little girl when we drove somewhere and he'd made me laugh when he'd do a finger puppet dance for the chorus. I love that it's a song about devotion that is conscious about the danger of temptation.

You've got a way to keep me on your side
You give me cause for love that I can't hide
For you I know I'd even try to turn the tide
Because you're mine, I walk the line
----

Love songs don't have to be about sexual love. I am of the opinion that the best love songs are the ones that can be about platonic love. When I write, I usually have a song that I pick that sums up a character or a situation. I had been looking for the perfect song to sum up the relationship between a father and his daughter and I thought "Yellow" by Coldplay was the perfect song. I think it's the anthem of parental love. If there is one person you'd bleed yourself dry for, it's your child.

 Look at the stars,
Look how they shine for you,
And everything you do.
----
The Bittersweet
 Maybe it's the pessimist in me but I love love songs with a bittersweet edge. The sort of song about longing for someone that either can't be with you or won't be with you. Why? I guess Spock can sum it up best:
After a time, you may find that having is not so pleasing a thing, after all, as wanting
---- 

I don't know how country music got such a bad rep because it contains such gems! This is a particular favourite of mine. I remember hearing it in some movie and I had to look it up immediately to hear the whole thing. The last chorus just breaks my heart where she begins it with an edge and then just softens like she's giving in that her love isn't coming back. Tears.

 I walk for miles
Along the highway
Well that's just my way of saying I love you
----
I'm still bitter that I haven't ever seen Nick Cave in concert. As a teen, I was heavily into his music after seeing him performing in the movie Wings of Desire. I really like his dark "love" songs like "From Her to Eternity" (my favourite song) and "Loverman". "Into My Arms" has that bit of darkness but it's more sorrowful especially now after I read that Nick wrote it after a long-term relationship of his ended. With that in mind, it seems to be a song about hoping for the best for someone while still secretly wishing they'll realize they belong with you.

And I don't believe in the existence of angels
But looking at you I wonder if that's true

But if I did I would summon them together
And ask them to watch over you 

----
There's two songs by U2 that, when I hear them on the radio, I have to stop and listen to the whole thing. One is "With or Without You" and the other is "All I Want is You". They're both songs you need to hear through to the end especially All I Want is You. U2 have loads of songs about love that don't end happily but this one is just the most tear jerking. I remember hearing it for the first time live and it was the one song I immediately shut up to hear (only speaking up when everyone in the audience sang the last chorus). When Edge played the guitar solo, I wanted him to play it all night. It just reminds me of the storm of emotions you go through when a relationship ends: the sadness, the longing, the pain, everything.
But all the promises we made
From the cradle to the grave
When all I want is you 

 ----
Lastly....

The Sexy

Who says you can't lovingly tell a person you want to sex them all over? My personal faves.

"Glorybox" by Portishead.

I'm so tired of playing,
Playing with this bow and arrow,
Gonna give my heart away,
Leave it to the other girls to play. 

"Slow" by Kylie Minogue.

You know what I'm sayin'
And I haven't said a thing
Keep the record playin'

"If You Wear That Velvet Dress" by U2
I've been good 'cause I know you don't want me to.
 ----
Let me know some of your faves! My iPod is ever in need of more songs. 



Monday, February 4, 2013

Give me a head with hair

Tomorrow I’m going to get my hair cut. And as usual, I go in with an idea of what I want. 


 
Daryl Dixon and Michelle Williams: my two biggest hair inspirations
I found people have a strange obsession with women and their hair. About 4 or so years ago I decided to go pixie. I had done it before back in high school when my mother told me she didn’t want me accepting my diploma with hot pink hair and it should be my natural colour for that day.

My hair at the time was shoulder length and a faded pink. My roots were about an inch long and so I had the local hairdresser take it down to my roots. My mother’s response: “I meant dye it back to your natural hair colour!” 

I’ve always loved and wanted short hair. As a child, I’d stuff my butt length hair into a baseball cap so it wouldn’t get caught in branches when I’d play in the woods. I wasn’t allowed to cut my hair past shoulder-length because of my Dad. As my hair reminded him of his mother, I had to keep it long. I put up with it but would whine like the biggest spoiled brat when my mother would have to braid it for pow-wow. That braid was so tight it would pull the skin of my face taunt.

When I cut it pixie again, my hair was just above bra line. The hairdresser tried to talk me out of cutting my hair as “my round face would look terrible” with that short a cut. After mentally noting not to tip her, I told her just to do it as it was what I wanted. I had to keep telling her to go shorter until finally, my hair was less than an inch long and I felt fabulous. The hairdresser even admitted it suited me and ever since I’ve been a pixie. 

It drives me to fits of hysterical laugher when people act like cutting off that amount of hair is some brave feat. When people see my hair, some girls will say, “Oh, I could never go that short! It’s so scary!” A car crash is scary, cutting your hair isn’t.

I didn’t slay Smaug, I just cut off my hair.

But I guess it can be scary as I’ve noticed that people don't censor their opinions of a lady with short hair. I’ve had older women at work inform me that I’d look so much prettier with longer hair. Dude-bros have told me I look like a dyke. Magazines rarely have a model with short hair (unless Michelle Williams has something to promote). It also drives me nuts when folk will insult Carol of The Walking Dead by saying, “Well look at her, she’s ugly: HER HAIR IS SHORT".

 I’d love to know how she keeps her hair that short in an apocalypse when the guys can’t even shave but I digress

I’ll admit I have moments where I wonder if I should grow my hair out. I think about growing it out so I can rock a Betty Page look or braid it like Katniss in The Hunger Games but then I remember I hated looking after my hair and it never looked good on me. Whereas my sister's hair is a manageable cape of Rapunzel-ish beauty, my hair, when it’s long, has a life of its own. It crimps in weird places, it grows awkwardly, and it doesn’t hold a style (my friend took 6 hours to curl it once and the curls started to unravel within half an hour).  And I always used my hair as a curtain I could hide behind. It was an excuse to be shy. And lastly, my hair was usually long because someone else wanted it that way. When I find myself asking why I want to grow my hair out, it’s usually because “Oh, that dude will find me prettier”, “I’ll look more like a girl”, etc. 

Well, fuck that. The reason I don’t grow it out is I love it the way it is. I feel prettier. I like the lightness of it. I like its sharpness. Sure I hate that it still finds a way to grow awkwardly (The back of my head and I hate each other for just that reason) but I'm not planning to grow it out past 2 inches anytime soon. 

My hair being short doesn’t make me any less of a woman despite what some old biddy may say. My boyish short hair is a girl’s haircut because a girl is wearing it (and rocking it).

And if a boy I date ever tells me “I want long hair”, I’ll tell him to grow it himself. 

Soranik Natu, Green Lantern of Sector 1417: doesn't need long hair.

Tuesday, August 2, 2011

Purple Rain

U2 7 Part 4: Minneapolis




I had originally bought my tickets to U2’s show in Minneapolis because they hadn’t scheduled a show in Winnipeg. When the tour was rescheduled, my mom wanted to come to the show in the States after she was blown away by U2 in Winnipeg. So the original group heading down south was my mom, my sister Kerri, and me with me doing the driving.

Unfortunately my mom had surgery scheduled for the Monday after U2 and there was no way she could go with us and get back in time for her procedure. We decided to give the spare ticket to Kerri’s boyfriend Sean in exchange for his car and driving duties (as I hate driving and only do it when I have to).

Sean’s not the biggest U2 fan and his only exposure to them before he dated Kerri was Bono’s “appearance” on South Park. He was the driver on the fateful day where we met U2 and originally had gone grudgingly. When we saw U2’s plane for the first time, my excitement filled the car until all three of us were screeching that we were going to miss them if we didn’t haul ass. At one point he was so pumped full of endorphins that he probably would have followed their car if we asked (we didn’t).

We left early Friday morning, starting the 7+ hour drive to Minneapolis with Sean’s GPS as our north star (or south star if you want to be technical). We got to the border and we were told Kerri's passport wasn’t valid.

My first thought: Kick her out. Kick her out. Kick her out.

Before I could get my sister’s door open, the border guard told us, “Yeah, she needs to sign it! Sign it before you come back and see you later.”

The three of us breathed a sigh of relief and we went forward into North Dakota, Sean and I giggling that we had both thought about kicking Kerri out of the car. Kerri replied, “I know! I felt your evil eyes on me the moment she said something was wrong!”

Kerri has this mad obsession with American Wal-Marts, especially after she found out about Super Wal-Mart. I think being able to buy a gun, a cake, and clothes all in the same place just appeals to her. So we stopped at this large one somewhere in North Dakota to pick up snacks. I purchased a bottle of water and a WWE Magazine as it was cheaper in America and it had a fantastic article on Wade Barrett, my favourite wrestler of the new batch and current object of my sports entertainment affection.

Excuse me, I’ll be in my bunk.

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Anyway, where was I?

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The Minneapolis trip was the first time I stayed in a hotel during my U2 travels and the first time I ever had a hotel room to myself. As children, my sister and I would have to share a room with my parents where we fought the urge to put a pillow on my dad’s face to stifle his snoring. The first thing I did in my Minneapolis hotel room was stretch out on the king’s size bed and just basked. After 2 years of hostel bunks, old couches, and pull-out-beds during my travels, a king-sized Super 8 bed was an absolute treat for my last date of the tour.

It was hot as hell when we arrived on that Friday so we spent the evening indoors at the Mall of America, taking the hotel shuttle to get there. Usually, I hate malls and I don’t like traveling just to shop but I love visiting MOA. I could spend hours at the Lego store or wandering around the amusement park or people watching on the 4th level. I also love it as it has the first Cinnabon I’ve ever visited (I had read about Cinnabon in the Animorphs series and always wanted to see what the cinnamon bun hype was all about). I ruined myself for supper with my Cinnabon bun when I met up with Sean and my sister at Famous Dave’s, a BBQ place that serves platters so large that they could fit on tractor tires.

Is there anything on this menu that isn't covered in gravy?!


Random aside but it continues to astound me how large the portions are in America. I kept forgetting about it when I’d go to order a medium drink and get what is considered a large in Canada. I once said to a person at a North Dakota Wendy’s, “This is a medium? What is the large? An oil drum?”

Show day I slept in while my sister and Sean went to check out the local zoo. The forecast called for rain with some meteorologists predicting a storm that would start around the time U2 went on stage. After deciding navigating the transit system to the stadium would be too much of a hassle, we took the car to a pay lot near the University of Minnesota that offered a shuttle to the concert.

It was around 4 when we parked the car. The sky was overcast with the sun occasionally peeking through and the air was thick with moisture. It took 10 minutes for the shuttle to arrive at the TCF stadium, stopping right in front of the GA gate with the huge GA line snaking halfway around the stadium.



“Are we going to line up?” Sean asked, eyeing the line.

“Nope, let’s eat.” I said as we wandered about eventually heading to a nearby pizza joint in the university village near the stadium. The sky started to spit rain as we got inside. It was packed but we were served quick enough considering. The drink specials were insane due to the stadium not selling booze at the show that night (as it was on a university campus). When I went to use the bathroom after we got into the stadium, I’d see tiny baby bottles of booze littering the path and in the port-a-potties, empty of course. Funny enough, it was the only show I went to on this tour where the smell of pot didn’t hang over the GA like a cloud (But it could have been due to the rain).

When we got back to the line, people from the line were being allowed in 50 at a time. It was a lot more orderly than any U2 line I had ever been to and I was glad my sister didn’t have to implement her “Elbow to the Face” move she had planned to use if things got hairy.

I knew I had been to too many shows when I commented on how small the stadium was. The GAs for the Hippodrome and Anz had been seas of people but U of M was more like Winnipeg’s with the audience being a sort of “pub gig” for U2 considering its size. Everyone was crowded near the outer halo runway with a few people sticking to the back and sitting on the ground but with loads of room to move around

I took my sister’s hand, she took Sean’s and we ran over to the inner circle gate on the left side of the stage (Known as “Edge Side” to the hardcore fans). We got in and settled near the back where the runway rises to the back of the stage. That bit has become my favourite part of the GA as it still gives you a good view of the stage, a great view of the screen, you’re still in the pit, and you can move around without getting someone’s Irish flag in your face. You can also wave “hello” to the band as they ascend the stairs at the back of the stage at the start of the show.

It was getting muggier and muggier that evening with occasional gusts of wind chilling the skin. With the sky darkening as U2’s time drew near, you could tell it was going to rain.

The smoke machine puffed to life as the show started and the wind sent it right down into our area of the pit, giving our surroundings a dream quality. The lights bounced off the smoke and cast weird shadows, disorienting me as Even Better than the Real Thing blared throughout the stadium.

The rain started during The Fly and didn’t stop for the entire show; it ranged from beautiful little drip drops to a straight-up shower. I’ve been through monsoon season in the Bay of Bengal where the rain fell so hard and thick that just running to the car 2 feet away would get you drenched. I didn’t experience that sort of rain again until the concert that night. The rain fell just as hard as it did in Bangladesh, some of it gathering strength somehow as it fell off the Claw onto my head.



I had been wearing my dupatta (a scarf from Bangladesh) to cover my head during the initial spit of rain but even it couldn’t handle the downpour that started. My sister and I whipped out our rain ponchos that we had been hanging on to since U2 in Winnipeg and put them on.

Before that night, I would have thought a show in the pouring rain would have tied Montreal 1 as the worst U2 show I’ve been to. But as the rain fell and our area was flooded with water and smoke from the smoke machine, it was magic. The wind howled and whipped the smoke around in strange shapes, the rain cascaded off the Claw in a waterfall, and everyone was soaking wet even in ponchos and rain gear. And no one gave a damn about the rain like no one cared about the cold in Winnipeg once U2 started to play.

Some bands would let the rain get to them but not U2. When the rain fell harder, they played harder. Bono strutted around the runway almost like he was daring the sky to try and shut him down. He got as soaked as we were.

He also covered every rain related song he could think of.


The lightning started next. At first I thought it was just another part of the light show but noticed it didn’t fit the song. The floor of the GA was metal and covered in rain water. I’m terrified of lightning in a safe dry house so I was nervous as hell standing in that GA as the storm really started. And even though I thought about running for cover in an area that didn’t have a conductor as a floor, I didn’t leave.

I felt like a little kid playing in the rain. I wish I had rubber boots! I was kicking up puddles, dancing and jumping to the music. During Get on your Boots, my sister and I sang along at the top of our voice. During Elevation, we got sick of waiting for Bono to get through “Can’t Stand The Rain” so we started the song ourselves along with everyone else in the audience.

But my favourite part was during Vertigo. My sister used to joke that she’d yell, “Turn it up, captain!” during the song in concert. I didn’t hear if she actually did it but we both screamed out, “Unos, dos, tres, catorce!” at the start of the song and jumped like a bunch of kangaroos as Edge played the first bit of the song. I think this song is one that comes alive in concert and the chainsaw sound of the guitar just sounds better when Edge is playing it right in front of you.

Kerri and I were holding hands as we jumped and we lifted our intertwined hands into the air during the chorus with everyone hearing us yelling, “OLA!” and “Donde Esta?” like drunk kids. Sean, meanwhile, was laughing at our total lack of restraint but he was having a good time despite not having a poncho. And I think he sang the “Yeah, Yeah, Yeah!” parts at the end of Vertigo with us though I couldn’t see him through the rain.

Another memorable moment that night was during Where the Streets Have No Name. I’ve formed such an attachment to that song. Every single U2 concert I’ve been to, Streets is the song that never fails to bring the audience to its feet. If the audience isn’t the best (like it was in Vancouver), this song brings them around. If the audience has been insane all night (like Sydney and Winnipeg), the audience gets their second wind. That night as they started the song, I felt a little choked up. This was the end of a journey I had started almost 2 and a half years previous. It had rained in Vancouver for my first show and it rained in Minneapolis for my last; the rain bookended my travels. As I cheered my final time for the 360 version of Streets, I was so happy to be there.



The rain stopped for a moment after Streets was over and I laughed when I saw Sean, soaked to the skin and his clothes heavy with water. I yelled into Kerri’s ear, “Let’s head out! Sean is about to drown!”

There was a surreal moment where the band started “Hold Me Thrill Me Kiss Me Kill Me” as we tried to find a way out to the shuttle that would take us to the parking lot. We ran up the stairs into the stadium proper as yellow and green lights lit up the inside. It was like that scene in Batman Returns where Bruce Wayne is sitting in the dark of Wayne Manor when the Bat Signal ignites and it shines into his study. The light was brighter somehow because of the moisture in the air and it felt like it was following us as we went out. Before we went down the stairs leading to the area where we were to catch the shuttle, I turned to Kerri and Sean and gushed, “I love this song!”

The yellow and green light lost us so they shone skywards like true Bat Signals onto the clouds above the stadium. “It looks like they’re about to release the Smilex gas!” I joked as another lone nerd waiting in line for the shuttle giggled, hearing me. The mirror ball at the top of the Claw lit our way back to the parking lot and the sound of the show faded as we got further away.



“Thanks for coming with me,” I randomly told Kerri and Sean as we rode the shuttle. They both smiled.

The rain had finally ended as the shuttle arrived at the parking lot and my skin had a chance to dry. My shoes weren’t as lucky as both Kerri and I stepped into a deep puddle near a group of port-a-potties. Both of us hoped the puddle was just rainwater.

-----


Despite the awesome concert and the impressive show of all the rain related songs Bono knew (including Purple Rain by Minneapolis-born Prince), I was a little down that U2 didn't whip out their own rain related songs like Electrical Storm, Summer Rain, or MLK.

As we headed back to the hotel, I had MLK stuck in my head and kept humming it to myself.

If the thundercloud passes rain
so let it rain
let it rain
rain on him


Best summer ever.

Monday, August 1, 2011

This ain't no party, this ain't no disco, this ain't no fooling around

U2 7 Part 3: Montreal




My tickets to Montreal and Minneapolis had been on my fridge for little over a year. So I was a little sad to finally take my tickets for Montreal off the fridge. I slid them into my passport along with my boarding pass the evening before I left.

The morning of my flight, I was running late as I missed my bus and so I hauled buns to another bus stop 3 blocks away. On the way there, my mom called to tell me to have fun and be careful. I told her I'm always careful as I threw my luggage into a transit bus and got on.

I arrived at the airport with enough time to get through security (where a security guard giggled when he saw the Iron Man/War Machine cover I have on my Macbook). I wasn't sure if I was at the right gate until I saw a guy in a U2 shirt and a U2 hat.

"Ok, it's the right plane," I told myself.

The guy in the u2 gear was Mark. Mark was the guy that was interviewed on CTV when the u2 concert in Winnipeg was announced. I found this out when we rode the bus together from Montreal-Trudeau. I told him with a laugh the story of how a few of my friends were surprised it wasn't me that was interviewed as Winnipeg "most obsessed U2 fan".

I arrived in Montreal and got lost, spending an hour and a half navigating the metro and wandering around Old Montreal. I had a date with the awesome Akwiratékha to check out the Indiana Jones Exhibition at the Montreal Science Center and was hoping I wouldn't be that late.

Luck wasn't with me on this trip as I quickly found out. Though I found Ak and later we met up with Kim (who I was staying with), I wasn't as fortunate with other people I had said I'd meet up with. Mark and I said we'd seek each other out on Night 1 but that didn't work out. My friend Caroline had been delayed on her flight out and didn't arrive until the afternoon on the day of night 1. And though I saw Maddie, I was unable to speak to her due to an event that I'll talk about in a sec.

The night before the show after Kim and I got dinner, I asked if she wanted to go with me to check out the site so I knew where I was heading.



We arrived around 10 to the Hippodrome, a horse racing track converted for the concert. A fence surrounded the area with a huge line of people already waiting for the show the next day. Officially, you weren't allowed to line up until 6am that morning.

But that was on the stadium grounds. There's no such rule at the Wal-Mart right next door. Kim was blown away by the size of the city that had gone up for the shows and surprised that people were already waiting.

I asked a few people if they were keeping a list.

For those that don't know, the list is Serious Business in the u2 fandom. I've only gone on the list once (Sydney 1) and never again as I thought it was a complete and utter waste of time. The way it works is whenever the line is started (and this can be when the 1, 2, and 3 haven't even arrived in the city of the show) everyone has to check in with the starters of the line to get assigned a number. If you sign up a day before the show, your name is put on the list and you show up at a specified time (Usually at a time before transit starts running so you'll need car) for "roll call". Your spot is saved in line and you can go to your hotel to get some sleep as long as you arrive before the roll call time.

It tends to get unfair really fast (the starters of the line signing up their friends into better spots even if they arrived later, etc) and I hate the process to be honest. It's also useless: I walked into Sydney 2 as the gates opened and got the spot I wanted, right in between numbers 23 and 212.

Now, I know that not all shows can be like Winnipeg and Sydney. I understand that things can go wrong. But that night, when I was heading back to Kim's, I began to wonder if my favourite band was worth the crap I went through that night.



After I got breakfast with Kim the morning of the show, I headed down to the Hippodrome armed with water, sunblock, a hat, an umbrella, a small stool, and reading material. As I headed in, I noticed that the line for Night 2 had already started and was 10 people strong outside the gate leading into the venue.

The area where the GA line was waiting was on gravel and there was no shade. I was glad I brought my umbrella so I sat down and waited.

Things were going well and I'm not sure what happened. I think some douche at the front jokingly yelled, "Oh, I think they're opening the doors" and 700 or so people rushed forward as a result

So after a calm and orderly queue with people nicely spaced apart, 700 or so people are standing with less than a hair's width between them in the hot sun. And the venue wasn't going to let us in for another 2 hours.

Not surprisingly, people started getting ill (me included). The line surged forward again a half hour or so later and I went with it.

I was starting to feel a little dodgy and no amount of water was helping me. I drank my 2 bottles and was still sick. My face was soaked with sweat, my head was pounding, and I felt like I was going to throw up.

Someone asked me something in French that I couldn't really understand. "What?" I asked. This shirtless dude stood next to me, concern on his face, "Are you all right?"

I shook my head, no. "Give me your umbrella," he said and opened it, blocking the sun for me. "Hey, water girl!" He yelled at one of the vendors that were snaking their way through the line. "Get your butt over here."

He bought me a water and kept an eye on me, asking me questions about Winnipeg, the shows I had seen, and making fun of this one girl.

There was this girl that had been left behind during the initial rush and lost her place near the front. She was forcing her way forward but had reached a wall near us as no one was going to let her pass. For the next half hour or so, she was screeching about how she had lost her spot in line and people should let her pass (No 'please'). She needed to find the people she was with, she kept saying. The guy holding my umbrella was trying to be helpful to her and asked, "Have you seen your friends yet?" And in the snottiest tone I've ever heard come out of someone over 9, she said, "I DIDN'T SAY THEY WERE MY FRIENDS. JUST THE PEOPLE I WAS WITH."

The guy told me later, "I guess U2 are the only friends she needs".

I was really sad that in the next surge I lost the guy in the shuffle (he had given me back my umbrella when I told him I was feeling better). Whoever this guy was (who I only knew as Farnsworth Bentley after he jokingly started calling me P.Diddy), thanks to him for making sure I was ok.

Things didn't get better when we were finally let in. People were pressing forward, knocking over security gates, and just dropping their gear where it landed to trip the person behind them. I moved out of the crush and stood on the side for a few minutes to get some air. I love U2 but I promised my mother I was going to be careful. Besides, I didn't want to die for U2. I only have but one life to give for rock and roll.

I got into the inner circle in the center but quickly realized I wasn't going to last. There was still no shade (my umbrella was taken at the gate) and the show wasn't going to start for another 2 and a half hours. Though I was seated now, my head was still pounding and it was way too hot. After a few minutes I decided I would rather see the show than have to be taken out on a stretcher, so I told the people next to me they could have my spot and made my way out.

As I was navigating the people, I saw Maddie (thanks to the sign she was holding) but couldn't get nearer to her to chat. I reckon the look of my foot standing near her for too long annoyed this one girl who was sitting on the floor. She pushed me really hard in the shin screeching, "YOU'RE STEALING MY SPOT".

I was way too pissed and ill to put up with it after all I had gone through that day so I yelled in terrible French,

Va te faire foutre!

And told her if she didn't let me pass, I'd be sick all over her. She gave me a look and turned aside and I finally got out, heading towards a grassy area in the shade of the bleachers.

I spent the whole evening on the grassy area with a great view of the screen and a chance to cool down from the heat and the annoying. By the end of the show, I was still feeling a little sick so I left early. And was glad I did as I found out later that night some people waited for the Metro for 4 hours after the show was over.



-----


Night 2 was better as I didn't go until 8:30pm and spent the day hanging out with Kim.

I think my interaction with Kim was the purpose of my trip rather than the shows. I ended up learning a lot about what I wanted to write, who I wanted to write for, and got a kick in the butt when she told me I wasn't ever going to be successful if I didn't start letting people read my stuff.

Some of the people I consider good friends are mostly people I haven't ever met in person. Kim was one such person. And every time I meet an online friend I've known for years, I'm always nervous that we aren't going to get on like we do in the realms of twitter and facebook.

I was very happy to find out that Kim and I ended up getting along great and I had a fantastic time. She has an always open invitation for me to become her roommate (sorry, her current roommate) and she can always stay at my house if she ever needs to come to Winnipeg. I'm planning to attend San Diego Comic Con with her next year and can't wait.

-----


Night 2 I arrived just as the opening act was finishing and U2 were about to go on. I was trying to find a place to get a hamburger when I noticed a group gathering near the back of the Hippodrome. I went to see what was going on and it hit me that U2 were going to pass by. To confirm this, the security guards were setting up tape and telling people they had to go around.

I didn't have another u2 encounter but I did see Adam's bass.

Observe


I found another grassy area near the Red Zone 2 entrance and lounged around, drinking the biggest rum and coke I've ever had and the coldest turkey pita.

One of my favourite bits about night 2 was when Vertigo was playing and I was jumping with this group of people behind the bleachers near the Red Zone 2 entrance. One of the guys yelled, "Isn't this a race track? LET'S RACE!" And we all ran towards the end of the bleachers about 200 yards away. I was trying to kick up a dirt trail and was giggling like a mad woman (Hey, I blame the cold turkey pita). My black shoes, my feet and calves were grey from gravel when I got back to Kim's that night.

I left early that night as well after I heard Where the Streets Have No Name and made it to the Metro as they ended Ultraviolet and started With or Without You.

I caught a few Zs on the Metro and walked the rest of the way back to Kim's rather than wait for the bus. On the walk back, I wondered if I had reached my U2 limit as not even New Year's Day had amped me up. I was disillusioned by those fans I encountered acting like entitled babies over "their" spot and the GA process in general. And after 6 shows, I thought that maybe the novelty had worn off.

Luckily, Minneapolis happened.

Friday, July 29, 2011

Heart of Gold

U2 7 Part 2: Winnipeg.




Right before Australia, U2 announced that they were adding more dates to their summer 2011 tour and added my home city Winnipeg.

I found this out at 6 in the morning and ran into my sleeping sister’s room and jumped on her bed, freaking out, “U2 ARE PLAYING WINNIPEG!” If there was anything that could have eclipsed my trip to Australia, it was this. My favourite band finally playing my city after a decade of skipping us, I was so ready for May 29th.

The few days before the show were the most surreal of my life. For one, I was certain something awesome unrelated to the show was in my future. I wanted to meet the band and thought that I had no better chance to do it than in my own city. It was the Thursday before the show and I heard on the radio that U2 were going to be rehearsing at a downtown theatre and filming a movie. I’m quite convinced the band themselves released the information as they could have totally kept this a secret if they really wanted to. Anyway, that day the theatre (The Walker/Burt) was crawling with people who were trying to catch a glimpse of the band despite being told that they weren’t there. One funny bit from that day was this woman asking a security guard/roadie if U2 were really coming. The guy was standing in front of equipment that had “U2” written on the side and he deadpans, “No, of course not”.



That Friday was buzzing with potential energy and that whole day at work I couldn’t sit still. Over lunch, my u2 requests to a local radio show were played with the DJ wishing me luck on my Bono encounter quest. Later that afternoon, I got a text from a friend that said they knew when U2 were arriving and if I wanted my chance to meet them this would be it. They couldn’t tell me where their plane was going to be but they told me the band would arrive at 5:30.

The rest of the afternoon, I was a bundle of nerves. I kept wrestling with the decision to go. Should I go? What would I say if I actually met them?

What decided it for me was when I asked myself Will I regret it if I don’t go?

I would regret it and so I called my sister and asked if her boyfriend and she would be willing to come with me to the airport to find U2.

I guess everyone who admires someone imagines what it would be like to meet that person. Meeting Bono, Adam Clayton, and The Edge was better than I imagined it would be. For one thing, all three acted like they were absolutely excited to meet me (and everyone else obviously). Adam approached me and I remember I said “hi, Adam” to him while my sister filled in the blanks when I was struck dumb by his awesomeness. She told him I was a huge fan of his hence my inability to speak. He shook my hand through the fence and held my hand. He looked me in the eye and smiled and told me how happy he was to meet me. I must have said something but I think I only smiled.

Adam is my favourite member of the band in case it wasn’t obvious.



My sister and I both talked to The Edge. I told him how awesome it was to meet him; my sister added that she hoped his trip was fantastic. He was shyly smiling and thanked us and told my sister that the trip was great. He hoped we had a good time at the show and we scoffed and told him, “Of course we will!”

Then we met Bono and I could tell my sister was waiting for the epic freak out. To be honest, I was expecting it as well. We waved to him as he stepped off the plane and he waved back. (My sister: "Did he just wave back?") I was the second person he approached and as he stood in front of me in his Spice Girl-like platform shoes, I saw myself reflected in his sunglasses. He smiled warmly, “Hello.”

The most common remark I’ve always heard from people (even people who aren't u2 fans) that have met Bono is that he makes you feel like you’re the only person in his universe. Of course, I didn’t believe it.

That day at the airport, he kept smiling at me like I was the most precious thing in the world. Looking back on it now, I wonder how I didn’t freak out.

I mirrored his smile and said, “Hi. Umm...would you sign my picture? It’s from when you played Sydney.”

He looked at the picture and grinned, “That was a fun night.” I agreed and watched as he signed the back. He and I worked out a plan to get it back through the fence as he smudged the date on his autograph when he tried to send it through the first time. He apologized and I told him it was ok. “Aren’t you a sweetheart, “ he said.



The rest of the conversation was a blur as I was overloaded with serotonin. I remember they took the time to talk to everyone and I spoke to Bono briefly but can’t remember what I said. Finally, Edge and Adam headed to their cars while Bono started to take pictures with the people who were left. I remember slowly sneaking forward and saw my moment to ask, “Hey, Bono? Is it ok to get a picture?”

“Of course!” He said happily.

I’m going into the 3rd month of having that picture of Bono and me as my profile picture on Facebook.

U2 have officially ruined me for every other celebrity encounter I will ever have. And this was just that Friday!

Me reflected in B's glasses


The next night my sister and I went to snoop around the Walker/Burt Theatre as I had heard that U2 were rehearsing songs off of Achtung Baby (my favourite album). Though we heard no songs off of Achtung Baby, we did hear Elevation. And we arrived just as they were finishing up and they came out to sign autographs. My sister didn’t get a Bono autograph the Friday at the airport as Bono took my only Sharpie. The best bit of that night was when Bono recognized my sister from the airport and drew a flower for her as he signed his autograph.

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I wasn’t certain how show day was going to top the Friday and Saturday preceding it. Show day cracked its knuckles and said, “Oh, really?”

Since I had the end of the year ceremony for my part-time job that morning, I didn’t arrive in the Red Zone 2 line until 4. The Red Zones are 2 VIP areas near the stage that are won through auctions with some of the proceeds going to charity. Sometimes the auctions can get a little pricy (I paid 250 for the one I had in Vancouver) but sometimes fortune smiles on you (The Winnipeg Red Zone ticket was only 10 dollars more than what I had paid for my mom’s GA ticket). The Red Zone 2 line was about 30 people strong when I arrived. I ended up passing the time by trading stories with this couple about our U2 encounters that weekend. Security and cops were out in full force. I saw some cops sending people away from the tops of a nearby parking garage with a top level that looked into the stadium. I saw employees of the multiplex next door on the roof of the theatre, snapping pictures of the stage.

It was a fun environment to be in and everyone was hyper with anticipation. Red Zone 2 was a little surprised when a police car with its lights on came rolling up the closed street right next to our line. The police car was followed by a fleet of Escalades and everyone knew who was inside. When Bono rolled down his window, the line cheered and waved frantically and pressed against the fence to check out the rest of the band as they made their way into the stadium.

One of my favourite memories of that night was sitting on the pavement in the Red Zone line, when u2 started sound checking this haunting version of Magnificent. They played it 3 times, each time incompletely. Some guy yelled on the last restart, “IT SOUNDS GREAT. IT’S FINE, GUYS. LET US IN.”

My spot on the floor was great with the best view of the screen and the stage; it was also right in front of where one of the bridges stopped when the band moved to the outer walkway that haloed the main stage. My mom was surprised when the bridges moved above the heads of those in the GA pit that surrounded the main stage (she being in the pit that night with my younger sister). My mom and sister were right in front of me, across the runaway. As a result, my sister got a bunch of hilarious pictures of my reactions to whenever Bono was in front of me.

It was my mom’s second concert ever and she said her favourite part was when Bono sang “Will You Still Love Me Tomorrow?”

My dad meanwhile was in a parking lot nearby when U2 started the show and he said he was almost knocked to the ground by the sound of Even Better than the Real Thing starting.

The much argued over bit of Mysterious Ways mentioned below


That night, I was so surprised by the crowd. Winnipeg is well-known for its concert heckling and general hard-to-impress attitude so I could not believe how excited everyone was. People I had heard say they wouldn’t be caught dead at a U2 show were sitting in the most expensive sections. Merch was sold a day before the show because there was such a demand for it (I heard from a friend that everything U2-related at the nearby shopping centre had sold out the day of the show). When Snowbird jets flew over the stadium right before u2 came on, the whole audience reacted like little kids. And when the show finally started, people went insane. It was great! It reminded me of the Sydney crowds and the energy fueled my already extremely hyper mood.

Earlier that morning a severe storm had been forecast but by show time the sky was clear but it was so cold. I once joked that I hoped it snowed on show day and thought it might that night. I borrowed my friend Joyce’s gloves for a bit to try and get the feeling back in my hands.

Once the show started, no one cared about the temperature. At times my hands felt like they were going to shatter when I was clapping and the cold metal rail hurt when it touched my skin but that was just background noise and was like it was happening to someone else.

Winnipeg is my favourite show of the 7 I went to. Hell, it’s probably my favourite concert ever. The audience was full of energy, the band fed off the energy and gave it all back (despite Larry disappearing 3 or 4 times to put on more clothes), and the set list was full of surprises as I hadn’t spoiled myself for the show.

-----


Best bits?

  • The sound of Even Better than the Real Thing blaring through the frozen air of Winnipeg at the start of the show
  • The Desmond Tutu additional bits and the gospel backing that made Magnificent even more...well magnificent (Even if Bono said they messed up the ending)
  • Joyce, her friend, and I pulling all sorts of faces (ranging from happiness to awe to “HOLY SHIT”) when Bono stood in front of us after coming off the bridge during Mysterious Ways. We later fought over who he had been singing to (it was me)
  • The “serious” poem Bono had two girls read that ended up being the lyrics to “You Ain’t Seen Nothing Yet”.
  • The singing of “Heart of Gold” by Neil Young at the end of Beautiful Day
  • Everyone hearing me squee when they started the intro to All I Want Is You and my surprise when everyone sang along to the song
  • Everyone hearing me squee again when they played Stay (Faraway, So Close) where they added the “You can go anywhere: Miami, New Orleans, London, Winnipeg and Berlin” lyric which caused my friend Trevor to grin
  • Zooropa which I never liked until I heard it grooving out of the extended screen (and which a few friends asked me about saying, "What was the name of that song where the screen asked me 'What do you want?'")
  • The slow dance where “Will You Still Love Me Tomorrow?” went into Where the Streets Have No Name
  • WHERE THE STREETS HAVE NO NAME

At that last point, I didn’t know whether to laugh or cry and I just cheered like I never cheered before. The red light they use for that song shined out of the 360 screen and lit up the audience like we were all around a fire getting warm. I couldn’t believe I was finally seeing U2 in Winnipeg and finally hearing Streets echo through the city. Best version of the song ever.

The coolest moment of the night was when they began With or Without You and Bono asked the audience to lift their lit-up phones to the sky to “make a Milky Way”. I’ve seen it done before but it was so cool to see it in Winnipeg. The screens of lit up iPhones, Blackberries, and other mobiles were pointed skywards and it looked like a winter sky, the “star” light sharp, ghostly and chilly.

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That weekend I met my favourite band, ended up with a picture in the paper, bought an obscene amount of u2 t-shirts, had an absolute blast at the concert, and ended up walking home that night because everyone that was at the show thought I was getting a ride with someone else.

All in all, not a bad weekend. It was so good I almost didn't want to go to Montreal and Minneapolis.

Almost.

Thursday, July 28, 2011

You're One of My Kind

U2 7 Part 1: Vancouver and Sydney


Having dreams is important. At least I like to think so. There was this person I knew that loved to devalue my dreams to the point where I stopped telling people what they were. I’d store them away as I was convinced everyone would treat them with the same contempt that this person had.

One of my dreams was to see u2 as many times on one tour as I could. I always got a kick out of the stories I read on the online forums about the people who would sleep outside the stadium/arena for 4 full days before the show just so they had a good spot in the general admission.

Honestly though I never thought I’d ever do it (the “seeing loads of shows”, not "sleeping outside the stadium"). My first U2 show was on October 28th 2009 and since then I’ve been to six more. Why do I do it? I did it because I love the band and have for over a decade. But I also did it because of a promise I made to myself.

In the summer of 2008, I had been sexually assaulted. During that time, I was not in a positive place emotionally and wasn’t sure I was strong enough to make it through the aftermath. An elder once told me that when something horrible happens to you there’s a year of turmoil before the recovery really starts. I had the support of family and friends but it was me that had to climb that mountain to get to the other side. But I couldn’t do it and I was falling apart. No matter how many times I heard that what happened to me wasn’t my fault, I didn’t believe it. I felt gangrene and didn’t know how I was going to stop it.

So on a particularly bad day 2 months or so after it happened, I promised myself,

I don’t care where and I don’t care if I go into debt to do it, I’m finally going to see U2 play.


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Vancouver: Despite being at my lowest emotionally, I thought that I should try to turn things around. I finally got my degree and started my first full-time job. In the spring of 2009, I decided to go to Northern Bangladesh to volunteer with an NGO for a month, a huge deal for me as I had never traveled overseas before. I had also applied for law schools and almost swallowed my tongue when I got into 3 (2 of which are some of the best law schools in Canada). I decided I was going to go to UBC.

In 2009, U2 released No Line on the Horizon and announced their world tour. Since they weren’t playing Winnipeg, I decided to go to Vancouver as I would have an excuse to see UBC and I also wanted to finally meet my very good and awesome friend Chloe. The concert was almost a year after the assault and acted as my incentive to push forward when things got hard. On bad days, I’d turn it around and tell myself, “Only a few months/weeks/days until the show”. It kept me afloat and didn’t allow the negativity of what happened to me to spread.

The three days I was in Vancouver, I was running on adrenaline and barely slept due to my excitement. Chloe and I watched U2: Live at Slane Castle the day before the show to hype us up and shared an iPod during the long wait in the GA line. When I moved to the line I was supposed to be in, I met these three sisters (Crystal, Cathy and Tammy) that lacked umbrellas so I shared my poncho which we held over our heads with cold hands. I met this guy named Scott who, after finding out it was my first u2 show, reassured me it was going to be awesome. When we finally got in, I was in awe by how big U2’s Claw stage was. When I saw BC Place Stadium during the Olympics, I scoffed and said that they must be lying about the location as the stadium looked a lot smaller when I saw U2 play!

I distinctly remember three things about that show: my absolute happiness when Larry started the drum solo intro to Breathe at the start of the show, how awesome it was when Amazing Grace led into Where the Streets Have No Name, and it was the night I realized I didn’t want to go to UBC.

Law school came up as an option for me when I had decided that going on to graduate studies in psychology wasn’t really where I wanted to head. Law hadn’t interested me but I felt like I needed an important career. The year after I was assaulted, I put so much work into getting into schools without realizing that my reason for doing it was the wrong one. I wanted to prove to my assaulter that I wasn’t the trash he had considered me. When I got into all 3 schools I wanted to get into, I wasn’t as happy as I thought I should be.

That night after U2 in Vancouver, I realized that my assaulter wasn’t watching my progress. My pursuit to prove him wrong by trying to be a super successful lawyer wasn’t making me happy. And when I thought about it, the idea of spending 3 years doing something I wasn’t sure about made me feel trapped.



I love Vancouver but as Chloe and I left BC Place Stadium, I realized my future wasn’t there.

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Sydney: Scott in Vancouver told me that U2’s next North American leg of their tour would either have a date in Winnipeg or Minneapolis. The tour scheduled for summer 2010 was announced and Minneapolis was the lucky bastard. After the fun in Bangladesh, I decided I wanted to travel more but wanted to start small. I planned to attend the Minneapolis show and the two shows in Montreal and saved up quite a dragon’s cache for the trips.

May 2010 rolls around and it’s announced that Bono is injured and U2 were postponing their North American shows. Not surprisingly I was down about the news but understood that it was better in the long run as I didn’t want an ailing Bono to put himself in danger just for a concert. Rather than save my money for the next year and the rescheduled shows, I decided to blow it all on a trip to Australia. Australia has always been my number 1 dream destination. But I didn’t think my dragon cache was enough to cover the airfare, especially so close to Christmas when I really wanted to go. The travel gods were smiling down on me: the ticket price was a full grand lower than it usually is. I was going to spend my December birthday in Aussie summer instead of Canadian winter and turn 25 on a 30C+ day. I booked the trip and had yet another thing to look forward to.

In the fall a few weeks before the Oz trip, U2 announced that Bono was feeling better and they wanted to restart the tour.

In Australia.

While I was there.

Not that it mattered but my favourite U2 concert video had been shot in Australia (Zoo TV: Live in Sydney) and I had read on forums that the Aussies were second only to the Irish in terms of their insanity over U2. Of course I was going.

Sydney had 2 shows: December 13th and 14th at Anz Stadium in Olympic Park. I arrived in Oz on the 10th and spent the whole day wandering around Taronga Zoo as I was too excited to sleep. That night I went to check out the stadium just so I knew where I was going the night of. The stadium made BC Place look like an arena and I was surprised that there were people already there waiting; some in tents, others taking turns sitting in chairs while their friends went to catch a few winks at a nearby hotel.



Since I didn’t like the idea of sleeping on the street in a foreign country, I didn’t line up until the morning of the 13th. Here I met and teamed up with Chyloe and Emma, two girls from Melbourne. The doors to the stadium weren’t opening until 5, the opening act (JAY-FREAKING-Z) wasn’t going on until 7 and U2 weren’t going on until 9 that night. So we had a lot of time to talk. I don’t know what it is about talking to a stranger that makes you spill your guts but when Emma asked me what I did back in Canada, I said, “I work for the government but what I really want to do is make my own movies.”

I was 4 when I saw Batman 1989 for the first time and I knew then I wanted to, one day, make a movie just as awesome. My desire to make movies took a backseat to my studies in psychology but it could not be restrained. After I graduated university, I took a few workshops at the Winnipeg Film Group and made 3 short films. During the filming, I fell in love with the process and didn’t even notice when we went overtime. Though I was scared that I might not be capable of making a career out of making movies, I remember I told Emma, “It’s always been a dream of mine to come here and despite being scared to come here alone, I did it. Maybe getting into film will happen too.” With my return to school to learn more about film making, I feel like I'm taking the necessary steps to go where I want to be.

But back to the concerts, one of my favourite memories of those shows was when we were finally let in on night 1. Emma, Chyloe and I ran down the circular ramp leading to the stadium floor as distracted security guards played with their phones and quietly ordered, “Don’t run.” The entryway to the field was ablaze with the setting sun, blinding me for a second, and I stopped running. In that few seconds before I ran after Chyloe and Emma, it hit me then that I was really in Australia and it wasn't a dream.. The sun made everything golden and it was a beautiful evening for a concert outside.



The mood of those shows in Australia is why they stick out so positively in my mind. Both nights were like a huge Christmas party and everyone was happy to be there (Including Oprah and 300 of her closest friends who were in attendance on night 1). The atmosphere was electric. I had a bit of a cold on night 2 and was convinced that I would stick near the back to take the show in from there. The doors opened and I was running with the herd and headed straight into the inner circle and got THE best spot in the history of time: dead center and 10 people away from Bono’s mic stand. I had the perfect view of the huge 360 screen above and the perfect view of the band on stage.

What I remember the most about that night was when they played New Year’s Day. That song was the one I always wanted to hear them play live and when Adam started the bass intro for the song, the roar from the crowd almost drowned out the music. When everyone started to clap in time with the song, I couldn’t see the stage through all the hands in the air.

That was also the night they played All I Want is You. That song is probably tied with Magnificent and Hold Me, Thrill Me, Kiss Me, Kill Me as my favourite song and I was stuck on perma-grin as they strummed the intro. It was so powerful to hear 75000 people singing along. Bono added this shout out to Michael Hutchence by including lyrics from Need You Tonight near the end of the song Slide over here and give me a moment, need to let you know, you’re one of my kind

I later took credit for the fact that they played that song as I held a sign on night 1 that read, “It’s my 25th Birthday, please play All I Want is You”. Despite the fact that Bono said otherwise, I know they played it because of my sign (*sniggers*). My kingdom for a bootleg recording of that night.



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Tuesday, July 12, 2011

Coping as a superpower

It was somewhere over the Pacific when I was shaken from sleep. Momentarily disoriented, I clawed madly for my glasses case in the pocket behind the seat in front of me. I got my glasses on as the plane shook again. Dropping my glasses case to my lap, I clutched the arm rests for dear life. U2’s MLK played softly out of my iPod headphones but not even Bono’s reassurances could calm me down.

The flight was already nerve wracking: from thinking I forgot my passport at customs, to the attractive Aussie sitting next to me that wanted to talk about nude beaches, I was certain I was about to re-enact the intro scene from Bioshock but in the Pacific rather than the Atlantic. I was shaking under my itchy airplane blanket.

The plane shook violently and before I realized what I was doing, I was saying the oath:

In Brightest Day,
In Blackest Night
No Evil Shall Escape My Sight
Let Those Who Worship Evil’s Might
Beware my power: Green Lantern’s Light



-----

Back in my undergrad, my developmental psych professor loved to talk about how important coping mechanisms were to children dealing with stressors. It didn’t matter what sort of mechanism it was, a kid could get through anything using them. I had my own coping mechanisms.

My grandma had strict definitions of what a girl was like and I wasn't it. As a kid, I would hide my butt-length hair under the hat I had taken from my dad and would pretend to be my own male twin. I spent most of my childhood angry at my mom for not letting me go as Batman for Halloween 1990 after she said I couldn’t because “Batman is for boys”. My grandma made a big deal once when she caught my grandpa taking a hockey stick out of the back of his truck that he had hidden from her. He had bought it for my birthday. I got the hockey stick but I think she was the reason I never got to play pee-wee ice hockey as a kid.

Since my grandma’s first language wasn’t English, she could be really blunt. I remember being hurt when she told my dad to stop watching hockey with me because it would “make me weirder”.

Looking back on it as an adult, I know she was worried about me. It was dangerous (and still is) to be a Native girl. I reckon she didn’t want me to draw attention to myself since the more visible you were the more likely you were to be targeted. But, being a kid, I just knew that there was something wrong with me. And it upset me that I couldn’t figure out how to change to make my grandma happy.

I think things would have been different for me if I hadn’t been sick in the car one day. My dad had taken me to The Pas and we were driving home. Before we had left, he bought me a Superman comic book. I started reading it and, as I did, I began to get dizzier, my head hurt, and saliva started to pool at the bottom of my mouth.

I got to a 2 page spread of green Kryptonite and my dad hit a bump as I did so. I threw up all over the comic book. As my dad stopped the car, a bit of green rock slivered through the bits of digested chicken fries into view and I threw up again. As my dad pulled me out of the car to clean me, I realized why I was so weird. I was Kryptonian.

I had seen the 70s Superman movies before this trip and knew the sort of effect Kryptonite had on a Kryptonian. The realization of my true origin was only solidified when my dad took me to see the burial ground near the rapids that gives my hometown its name.

The site around the burial ground has been blasted and driven over by heavy equipment for 40 years and looks like something crash landed there. My arrival took root in my mind: my dad had seen a light in the sky while he was out driving with my mom. They followed it and found my ship and me, as a baby, inside. My parents raised me as their child. My grandma decided she didn’t want people to catch on to my being an alien so she was always telling me to act normal.

Call it crazy but it helped me deal with my anger towards myself over never measuring up to what my grandma wanted. Though I knew deep down that I wasn’t the last daughter of Krypton, pretending I was helped me feel unique rather than weird and to not feel so bad when people called me the latter.

Some girls think they are princesses, others think they're Supergirls.


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Imagining myself surrounded in an aura of willpower energy helped me deal with my turbulent flight the same way imagining I was a Supergirl helped me deal with my negative thoughts of myself when I was a kid. The moral of this story? Cope the way you want. And beware my power, Green Lantern's light.